


Walking the Tightrope

by stardustsroses



Category: Six of Crows Series - Leigh Bardugo
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Post-Canon, inej ghafa - Freeform, kaz brekker - Freeform, kissing and touching kanej, post-ck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-14
Updated: 2018-06-14
Packaged: 2019-05-23 07:33:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,980
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14929937
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stardustsroses/pseuds/stardustsroses
Summary: This was a request on tumblr:@fireflyangelxx asked:just thought you deserved to know that your writing is beautiful and I loved both of your kanej fics <3 i live for post-crooked kingdom kanej because ugh my heart just needs more of them. Would you write one where one day Kaz wants to go back to his old farm and has to get the courage to ask Inej to go with him? fluff and some feels I guess c:This was inspired by the song Tightrope, from The Greatest Showman soundtrack





	Walking the Tightrope

Kaz Brekker.

Bastard of the Barrel. Dirtyhands. Thief. Murderer. King.

All of those were absolutely true. All of those were undeniable. And everybody in Ketterdam knew him by one or the other.

Kaz Brekker had made his enemies tremble as he walked past the streets of the Barrel he now owned. He had provoked frightened whispers amongst tourists and residents alike. Had proven himself to be one of the most dangerous men that had ever lived in all of Kerch. He had stripped two powerful, terrible men out of every penny they stole from him, and had made sure that they would never know peace again in their lifetime. He had crowned himself king of this city who took and gave him everything, and in it, he had created both chaos and peace.

Useless to say, Kaz Brekker had earned a reputation for being as ruthless and as lethal as the devil himself.

And yet…

And yet.

None of them knew him as that man – the man whose hands felt like they were made specifically to hold her, whose hands were gentle and soft to the touch, whose caresses felt like laying your cheek down in a cloud inside the gates of heaven. That man had never held a gun, that man had never willingly hurt anyone, that man had never used his hands to do terrible, unspoken things just so he could protect himself.

Only Inej knew that man during the ungodly hours of night and in the early hours of morning. The one who wrapped his arms around her as she slept, the one who whispered loving words of comfort in her ear until her eyes felt heavy, the one who smiled secret smiles just for her and stroked simple, gentle promises along her arms, her neck, her legs, with his fingertips. Not one soul knew him the way she did. The man who lifted her chin with a touch so delicate it turned her heart into glass and shattered it into a million tiny pieces, who touched his lips to hers under his sheets, who still had to fight his own demons every single night just so he could be that close to her.

Every night she saw him.

But in that particular night, when the moon was at its highest and the loud noises outside had been silenced by the stars, Inej found that he was just a little out of her reach. As he carefully wrapped his arms around her frame, pushing her gently to his naked chest, Inej could see a different set of shadows cross his eyes, a new kind of hesitance to him. She felt his grip tighten on her night gown, could feel his fingers twist the fabric just a little too roughly – and that frightened her.

Because they had come such a long way. Every night they broke a new barrier, every night they were closer to each other. And Inej couldn’t bear to have him so far away once more. Couldn’t bear to see those ghosts chasing him.

She decided to kiss them away.

At the first touch of her lips on his, Kaz’s body tightened. His hands clutched her waist like he wanted to pull her closer and push her away at the same time. But then – but then he exhaled into her mouth, and Inej felt his body melt into hers as his lips responded to hers, as his tongue slowly stroked her bottom lip before tasting her mouth.

Inej couldn’t breathe.

His hands loosened their grip, and stopped their trembling as his lips trailed little gentle kisses down to her jaw, then to her throat, where her pulse felt frighteningly fast. Inej’s hands slowly dragged along his arms, warning him before-hand where they were going, then they travelled along his back, feeling every contour of muscle as Kaz moved on top of her.

Inej gasped as his teeth grazed the base of her throat. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders, pulling him ever so close, wanting – needing – to feel the comforting weight of his body on hers.

But then, on either side of her head, Kaz was gripping the sheets so hard his scarred knuckles turned paler than his own skin.

“Kaz,” murmured Inej, attempting to open her eyes, attempting to come back to reality, and urging herself to pay attention, too see the strain in his neck, the irregular breathing.

Her mouth was dry. Her vocal chords were forming a noise she didn’t want him to hear, not now.

But Kaz seemed to interpret her tone as an encouragement and not as a worried question, for he moved his lips further down her body, memorizing her shoulder, her collarbones, trailing down, down to her cleavage.

It was an effort to keep herself tightly holding on to this earth. But it was the way he’d moved his hands to her thighs that cleared the fog in her mind, it was the way his fingers dug into her bare skin, like they were holding on to dear life, that had her mind scream at her something’s wrong something’s wrong.

He seemed lost in her body.

And usually she wouldn’t stop him – on the contrary, Inej found that her touch was always something that brought him back to her when the water started rising so she’d be more than encouraging, but-

But Inej could tell by the rush of his movements, when he was always so calm and restrained with her, that Kaz was running from something. She wouldn’t let him. Not without her.

“Kaz,” said Inej with difficulty, running her hands through his hair so as to snap him back to reality. Gently, so gently, she pulled at the tips of his dark locks at the back of his head, just so he’d look at her.

His eyes were two moons covered by storm clouds.

He blinked, opening his mouth no doubt to start an apology, raising his arms off the mattress to pull away from her, but Inej wrapped her arms around his shoulders once more and clenched her thighs around his waist. “Stay,” she said. “Stay with me.”

Kaz looked down at her for a second too long, then his body visibly relaxed once more – his shoulders hunched, his elbows lowering themselves on either side of her head, supporting most of his weight, his jaw stopped clenching, and his hands gently wove themselves in her hair, fingers twisting and running through the thick waves.

“Tell me,” she asked, searching his face.

“There’s nothing to tell.”

Coward, he thought. Ask her. Ask her. Just ask her.

But Kaz didn’t want her to see him like that. He didn’t want…he didn’t want her to witness all that repressed sadness he’d managed to hide all those years. He didn’t-couldn’t…not now, when they were happy and safe and in each other’s arms. Not when he wanted nothing more than to taste every inch of her body, certainly not when now his thoughts and nightmares weren’t stopping him from doing it. Not when she wanted him to.

He couldn’t ruin this.

Inej bit her lip. He followed that movement with his eyes, wanting nothing more than to do that himself. Feeling every curve of her body against his was indescribable. Having her strong, lean legs squeezing at his hips was tearing him apart bit by bit, and she didn’t know it.

“Will you continue what you were doing, then?” She asked, her voice low, her big eyes staring up at him. “Will you keep kissing me and touching my body with that much torment in your eyes?”

Kaz swallowed down the lump his throat, watching as she leaned up, feeling her lips touch his throat, lingering, tasting, gentle and yet filled with want.

She’d kill him.

“Or,” she said, even lower, pulling away to look into his eyes, “will you rather share that burden with me?”

Kaz wanted to devour her lips.

“I’d rather have your clothes on my floor and my mouth on your skin,” he said against her mouth. Kaz felt her breath catch, heard her swallow down her surprise. He made sure his lips were touching hers as he continued, “In fact, Wraith, I have a few ideas where I want my mouth. Would you like me to share?”

Inej blinked once, twice. More delightful to him than seeing her at a loss for words and eyebrows practically raised to her hair line, was seeing the blush creeping onto her cheeks and the way her eyes drifted down to his mouth slowly, then back to his eyes.

Inej gave him a little smile. “I want your mind as much as I want your body, Kaz.” She touched his bottom lip, tracing it with her thumb, pursing her lips to restrain her smile from widening. “But right now, I want your mind.”

Kaz touched her cheek, feeling her blood boil under his fingers – a part of him rejoiced at that, and the fact that it had been because of him. Because of his hands, his mouth, his words. He sighed, leaning down to touch his lips to her forehead.

“Inej,” he murmured. Her name in his mouth sounded so good, he always thought. He wanted to say It for the rest of his life. He wanted to sing it to her, softly, gently, until she fell asleep, putting as much love into the word as his heart allowed. “My mind is a dumpster of broken, forgotten pieces and ashes. It’s not a good place to be in. Trust me.”

“Your mind is beautiful. Utterly brilliant.”

He snorted.

“Are you calling me a liar?” She asked.

“My little Wraith. Always so positive. Always so delirious,” he mused, pestering her face with kisses.

Inej touched his neck, pulling back enough to look at him. “I know you, Kaz. But I only know a fraction of your mind. And that piece I know, I already love,” she said. Then she touched her lips to his, so briefly, so tenderly. She murmured, “Let me in. Take me to see the rest. I want to love it too.”

His heart was fireworks exploding in the night sky, a colourful mixture of sparks soaring through the darkness of the universe.

Kaz said nothing. He trailed his eyes along her beautiful face.

“You know,” she said suddenly. “I always found life to be like a tightrope.”

“Oh?”

Inej nodded. “It’s a fine line between good and bad, really. You walk through life never really knowing if you’re going to fall on one side or the other.” Inej dragged her fingers to his chin, feeling the very soft stubble there. “I, for one, try to stay up. It’s better up there, looking down at the world-”

“You’re sky high, Inej,” said Kaz. “I’ve already tipped over.”

“No,” she argued. “I have your hand in mine.” Inej grabbed Kaz’s hand, lifting up to his face as she entwined their fingers. “See?”

Kaz’s mouth quirked up.

“There’s no way that you’ll fall now,” she smiled. Kaz thought that smile could light up even the darkest parts of the deepest oceans. Inej looked at him, really looked at him, the way nobody really had, and she said, “I promised I wouldn’t let go. No matter what it is, when you’re ready, I’m here to listen and I’m here to pull you up, as you have done with me. I will never let you fall on your own again, Kaz.”

He wanted her to feel the impact of those words – Kaz wanted her to know that his heart had beaten all those years for the sake of revenge, but now…now it beat for her. Only for her. She already held his whole heart in her hand. He had trusted her with it and she had done nothing more than cherish it, treating it kindly and patiently, watching over it constantly – in return, she had handed him her own, despite it having been broken and stepped on and mistreated so much in her short seventeen years.

She had handed her heart to him on a silver platter and told him to either drop it or hold it carefully for her.

He had chosen right.

And Kaz thought that maybe…maybe he could spare a little of his mind in return. It was only right.

So he looked at her for a few long seconds, held her gaze for what it felt like a whole eternity, let her run her hands through his cheeks, caressing his skin, let her place her fingers through his hair, her fingernails dragging through his scalp slow, gently, in the way that made his eyes flutter.

And he quietly said, “I want to go back to where I grew up. To my father’s farm. I want to see it. His…” he swallowed, closed his eyes, breathed in. “His birthday is in a week and…and I don’t want to ignore it anymore. I want to keep some…maybe some of his memory alive, even if it’s foolish, I-” His mouth stopped moving. His voice died down in his throat. But then Inej was smiling up at him in the most loving way, nodding her head so as to encourage him to keep going. And he did, “I was wondering if you…not that you have to, of course, but…would you like to accompany me?”

Inej’s eyes glimmered. Her answer was her kiss. She pulled his head down to her, smiled widely at him, then touched her lips to him. He could feel how happy she was. How happy that confession had made her. And the fact that he was willing to let her see him, his beginnings, to go through that experience with him…Inej thought she could float.

She pulled away. There were tears in her eyes. “I love you,” she whispered, almost inaudibly. She smiled even wider, perfect teeth showing, kissed him once, twice. “I love you,” she said again. “Of course I’ll go with you.”

“Why are you crying?” He touched her cheeks, his heart light, his mind soothed. Slowly, he wiped a fallen tear. “Why are you crying, Inej?”

“I’m happy,” she said, shaking her head. She opened her mouth, shut it. Then she murmured into the skin of his cheek, her lips occasionally pressing into him, “I’m happy I get to have you. I’m happy to be with you. I’m happy that I get to live this life, these adventures with you. I’m happy that we’re touching and neither of us are pulling away. I’m happy…so happy to want you. Every bit of you. And I’m happy that you want me.”

There was a crease between his eyebrows as he observed her speak. His mouth was strained, as if he was biting the inside of his cheek. His hands touched her hair again – a comforting gesture she had come to adore. Inej pulled away to look into his eyes, and found them filled with unspoken emotion, covered in a glimmer only she could see – only she would ever see.

Kaz wiped the rest of her tears away with his thumbs and blinked back his. Though he knew if they somehow escaped, she’d be willing to wipe them for him as well.

“And I am happy,” she murmured, “that we’re walking this tightrope together, Kaz.”

He designed a smile – so bright and wide there was a dimple on his right cheek. Inej kissed it. Traced it. Memorized it. Then Kaz leaned in, touching his to her ear. He whispered, “My little Wraith.”

He whispered it twice more as he claimed her lips. Then a third time as he pulled away to look into her eyes. “Thank you,” he said. “Not just for agreeing to come with me. For being there. But for everything, Inej. Everything.”

She nodded, licked her lips, tasted him there. “You’re welcome, Kaz.” And Inej hugged him to her, touched her cheek to his, and closed her eyes, breathing in. It smelled like home. Inej whispered close to his ear, “My love.”

Kaz went still at the words, his nose grazed her shoulder, and there was a sharp intake of breath coming from him. Soon, Inej felt her shoulder wet, and Kaz’s shoulders shook slightly.

She held him tighter.

Kissed his cheek softly.

She held him through it.

Because sometimes that tightrope isn’t safe – sometimes it’s wobbly and thin and sometimes it can purposefully try and make you fall. But Inej, she’d risk it all – she’d risk it all just to keep them secure, keeping their steps firm on that line. So she held him. She held him for a long time.

And then, when his shoulders stopped shaking and his body stilled on top of her, she asked, so gently, “Why are you crying, my love?”

And Kaz pulled away, kissed her cheek, held her to his chest, and said, so softly, “Because I’m happy.”

She smiled. “Yes?”

He nodded, “Yes, Inej.” Kaz closed his eyes, smiled against her skin, trailed his mouth to hers. There were unspoken promises in that kiss. There was gratitude, and there was happiness, and there was excitement for what was to come. Most importantly, there was a promise for adventure, for love.

A promise of forever.

Kaz pulled his lips away, touched them to her ear, and he whispered, so gently, so softly, “Treasure of my heart.”

They walked the tightrope hand in hand.

And they were high up in the sky.

When they looked at the horizon in front of them, neither of them could let go, neither of them could promise nothing but the endless love they felt for each other. When they looked at the horizon, both Inej and Kaz saw their future written in that line where sea met sky. And neither of them could deny it:

It was truly a breathtaking view.


End file.
